gurgle Mums' panel birth stories - Laura

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My EDD was 17th March and my mother-in-law had come to stay with us from a week before that date in order to help out with our other daughter, Emma. Emma was three days early so we were all hoping for a similar thing this time round.

 

However....I had a midwife appointment on the 19th which included a membrane sweep. I had no idea what this entailed before it was explained but thankfully the midwife was really very gentle and it was no more uncomfortable than a smear test. I went home and spent that night thinking I might finally be going into labour as I was having quite painful twinges - much more so than my previous Braxton Hicks. Sadly, however, they all came to nothing and I had to continue waddling along, day after day. During that antenatal the midwife had also explained my options, now that I had gone past my due date. I had until full term plus 10 or 12 days, depending on which hospital I went to, before I would have to be induced. It was as the thought of being induced in a big hospital sank in that I started to really panic and feel like a failure.

 

 

I had my heart set on a water birth in a small midwife led unit, in Grantham. Emma was a water birth in a similar unit in Yorkshire six years earlier and it was lovely. I hadn't really planned her birth but was happy with the way it turned out and decided I wanted the same for her sister.

 

By the start of the following week I was a nervous wreck. I was 41 weeks pregnant and convinced I would have to be induced in a large, process line type hospital. I'd had a really unpleasant experience of a large hospital during my first pregnancy and was terrified of having to go through a similar ordeal with this bump.

The days were passing and with still no baby in sight I thought I'd better go and have a look around the ward at a large nearby hospital, just in case I did have to be induced there. I'd not even seen the place so thought it made sense. By this time I was miserably resigned to not having the birth I'd wanted or planned for. I'd had to take iron tablets and work hard to combat anaemia in order to be allowed to give birth at Grantham. It had been a hard slog, but I'd managed it and was considered a low risk in every other aspect, and therefore ideal for the unit.

 

The hospital looked the same as any other large hospital and left me feeling cold. Yes, it was clean and the staff were friendly - but then they would be, wouldn't they? I had a friend who had been induced there the week earlier and hers turned into a real horror story. My nerves were not calmed and I felt under enormous pressure to stop making a fuss and just get on with it. My mother-in-law's sympathetic attitude was wavering the longer she was away from home and I felt I was being overly fussy and emotional because I was so upset at the prospect of not having the birth I'd planned. I was not a happy fat lady.

 

Tuesday 25th March rolled by; I was 8 days over due and resigned to being pregnant forever.

 

I'd spent hours on the internet by now and had decided that there was no way I was going into a large hospital to be meddled with by doctors. If need be, I'd give birth at home as and when baby decided to appear. The moment I decided to shun the professionals and ignore the bullying - real and perceived, I relaxed completely.

 

 

It was a revelation to me. I stopped caring how other people were feeling about my being so overdue and refused to feel like a failure or a burden any more.

That day, I went into town - partly to kill time and partly to try to waddle the baby along a bit. I think in those final two weeks granny, myself and bump must have walked miles in a bid to coax the baby out! It was so incredibly painful though, every step hurt from the weight of my bump. The waddle was cut short and we returned home for a much needed rest.

 

 

That evening I once again took to my exercise ball - boing boing boing!

Another friend had recommended them and in my desperation I thought I'd give it a try. Walking, sex, pineapple, sweep - all had made no difference, so what the hell, I'd sit on a big bouncy ball and see what effect (if any) it had!

 

That evening the effect was definitely there! I was happily bouncing, much to the amusement of the mother-in-law as she watched Emmerdale, when I decided to get up. The low down achy pain from earlier hadn't really eased all day and it was actually quite painful sitting on my ball. I bounced a few times to help me before a final boing to my feet.

 

 

My husband found it most amusing as I quickly waddled to the loo - I'd not moved so fast for weeks. My waters had broken - at last! During my first pregnancy this didn't happen until I was in the pool so I was unaware of how it felt. Now I knew!

As I sat on the loo, requesting new pants and trousers, there was an air of excitement. I was finally going to have my baby - and soon.

 

 

A few phone calls later and I calmly pottered around the house collecting what I needed. My contractions were starting to increase in regularity and intensity during the 10-15 minute drive to the hospital. My husband had put on Pink Floyd -Dark Side of the Moon - as we drove to the hospital and I remained calm throughout.  

When we arrived at the unit I was welcomed by the friendly midwife on duty that night. It's a small unit and we were the only ones there so I was led straight into a room for an examination. Everything looked fine as my contractions kept increasing and as I sat on the end of the bed after an internal the last of my waters were released - like a torrent! I sat there, in a puddle with liquid dripping off the bed into another large puddle. Dignity leaves the building as soon as you're in the labour room! The friendly midwife went off to run a bath for me and to inform the second midwife. Water births require two midwives to be present, but no one seemed in much of a rush. It was about 9pm by now.

 

 

I got into the bath and winced as contractions kept coming, harder and more often.

I couldn't get comfortable lying down and had an urge to go to the loo, so I heaved myself carefully out of the bath and onto the loo. Things were starting to progress now and we moved into the pool room so that the midwife could start to fill the pool for me. They take quite a while to fill up as they're huge, so off I waddled again....

While the pool was filling I leant forward over a couple of cushions stacked up on the bed as each contraction hit. Now they were really starting to get painful and I felt well and truly in labour. Unfortunately, I'd misheard the midwife offering me the gas and air, so I had to struggle along without it for 15-20 minutes longer than necessary. Thankfully she re-offered it and I eagerly took her up on the offer!

 

 

Soon after, I was able to get into the pool and it was glorious!

Everything was exactly as I'd wanted it - the carefully put together playlist on my iPod was playing in the background, my mother-in-law wasn't in the room (she was during my first labour!) and my husband was next to me, holding the gas and air for me to inhale deeply as and when I needed it. The water was an instant relaxant and as I sank into the warmth I felt calm and in control.

 

 

That didn't last long though! Soon my contractions were really painful and I felt utterly shattered by them. It was around 11 o' clock by now and I was so tired it was all I could do to stop myself nodding off in between contractions. I got quite weepy as the realisation of the imminent pain sank in. I started to worry that I'd made a mistake opting out of an epidural and worried I couldn't manage it. I was scared because I knew that it hurt now, but it was going to get much worse before it was over.

 

 

As my contractions progressed I became more in tune with what my body was doing. I'd used so much gas and air with Emma that I had little idea of what I was really doing. This time was different though - I actually felt in control of my body and felt capable now of pushing my baby into the world. I began to breathe through the contractions more, relying less on the gas and more on my own inner strength. It was getting more painful each time but I gained confidence as I survived each contraction and was even able to have a bit of a laugh and joke with the ensemble around me of two midwives, Louise (the student midwife who'd been following my pregnancy) and my hubby Brett.

 

 

 

As the urge to push intensified I focused on the job in hand. I didn't try to push too hard in a desperate bid to get it all over and done with. I'd done that with Emma and suffered quite bad tearing. Instead, I worked with the contractions and went at the pace that was dictated to me by my body. I knew that I wasn't far away from holding my baby now but I had no need to hurry -it was happening.

At just after 1 am I'd done it - the ordeal was over; I was a mum again! As I sat back in the bath, shattered and relieved, I was handed the little girl I'd moments earlier pushed into the world.

 

 

I melted into my own world once more as I held my little girl close to me for the first time, not wanting the moment to end as I felt overwhelmed with relief, pride and love. I'd never got to hold Emma straight after giving birth to her so this was a really special moment for me and I didn't want it to end. However, I still had to go through the final stage of delivery which required being on dry land, so baby was handed to daddy as I heaved myself out of the bath and onto the nearby bed.

 

 

As I was covered in towels and injected to speed up delivery of the placenta, Brett handed our daughter back to me. 'How about Abigail?' he said. It just came to him as he took that first real look at her.

 

 

'Abigail? Ok, that goes, she looks like an Abigail.'

 

 

As I lay back for a couple of small stitches (big ow!) with little Abigail resting on my chest, Brett phoned granny to tell her the news. As somewhat bizarre luck would have it, Emma had woken up wanting the loo at about the same time and had asked granny where I was. Brett asked if it would be ok for them to come over now to see Abigail and I of course agreed. Despite it being such an ungodly hour I was delighted when my other little girl arrived to see her new baby sister. It was lovely to see them together for the first time and I felt happy that my family was now complete.

 

 

I didn't sleep for the rest of the night as I was so full of adrenaline but I felt wonderful as I took my baby home later that morning to start the joys of motherhood.