Bonding after birth

Bonding is that intense attachment you feel when you look at your baby and want to cry, hug him, protect him and shower him with affection.

The ties you form with your baby are so important because they provide him with his first strong intimate relationship, which helps him feel secure, confident and loved. So many of his social skills and emotional development rests on his relationship with those around him from a very early age. Don’t delay in starting the bonding process because you think he is too young to understand babies are very aware of their surroundings from the moment they are born.

Touch

Touch is essential, especially skin-to-skin contact. If your baby is premature, you’ll be encouraged to hold him naked next to your skin, or touch and stroke him as much as possible if he is in an incubator. Research has shown that skin-to-skin contact improves breathing and weight gain in babies, and promotes good sleeping patterns. Your baby will be kept warm by your body and will develop a sense of security, familiarity and comfort by being close to you. He’ll also get used to how you feel and smell.

Eye contact

Use as much eye contact as possible. Remember your baby can only see aaround 8-10 inches from his face, so bring your face close to his, look at him and smile. Babies have an innate ability to recognize human faces from other objects, so you or your partner’s face will become his favorite toy. He may try to imitate your facial expressions – try sticking your tongue out to see if he can copy you.

Speech

Although your baby won’t form words for some time, he may try a few little noises – his first attempts at communication! Talk to him in a soothing voice, telling him how much you love him, that you are his mommy and daddy, and that you’re there for him. It may seem silly talking to a tiny baby who doesn’t understand you or respond, but he’s learning the intonations of your voice and also the emotion you express through language.

Make sure your partner and any siblings your baby has spend lots of time talking, holding, cuddling and being close to him. The bond your baby forms with your partner and his sisters and brothers is very important too, and he’ll recognize some of their voices from when he was in the uterus.

The information in this feature is intended for educational purposes only. If you have any concerns about your health, the health of your child or the health of someone you know, please consult with a doctor or other healthcare professional.

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Last Modified: 24/07/2008

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