Coping with pregnancy as a single parent-to-be
Pregnancy is a magical time; one in which you will hopefully be filled with joy and excitement at the prospect of becoming a parent. However, it can also be a daunting period, especially so if - for whatever reason - the father of your child is not there to share the pregnancy with you.
If you've recently found out you're pregnant you may be filled with questions about becoming a mum and what it will entail. Having a baby is a life-changing experience but children bring with them many responsibilities. It can be particularly challenging if you’re facing parenthood on your own. It's still possible, however, to enjoy your pregnancy, partner or no partner. Here are gurgle's tips on how to cope with pregnancy as a single mum-to-be.
Your emotions:
If you're pregnant but have separated from the father of your child, the chances are that you’re feeling quite scared and alone. The most important thing to do, as with any relationship break-up, is to surround yourself with people who love you -your friends and family. They will act as your support network, helping you to get through the tough times and get the most out of your pregnancy.
You can confide in them all your worries and fears about impending parenthood. Not only that, but you can take your mum, best friend or maybe cousin to your appointments with your midwife, ultrasound scans and, if it’s your wish, they can be there to hold your hand at the birth of your baby.
You may also find it beneficial to meet other people in the same boat as you. If you're feeling that no one knows what you’re going through, meeting other single mums-to-be might prove really helpful and reassuring. Look out for childbirth groups in your local area that are geared towards single mums.
The people you meet could become life-long friends and hopefully you will also learn from each other about how you will cope practically and financially once the baby arrives. Talk to your GP or midwife for more information on antenatal classes for single parents in your area. If there aren't any antenatal classes for single parents in your area, you can always take a friend or family member with you; indeed, you may prefer to do that. Don't worry that you're going to be the only on there with no partner; many women either go alone or take a friend with them, even if they're not single, as their partner might be at work. You can also meet other single mums-to-be online; why not create your own gurgle group?
Try not to dwell on your situation. Keep busy doing things that make you happy, whether it be going to the cinema with friends, having a nice meal with your mum, reading a good book or just having a good old heart-to-heart with your best friend. Don't bottle up your emotions; it's normal to experience highs and lows during pregnancy and having a good cry can really help.
If you don't have family or friends around that you can rely on, there are organisations which can offer you support and advice through your pregnancy and beyond, like One Parent Families (www.oneparentfamilies.co.uk) or you could try www.singleparents.org.uk.
Remain positive; you’re about to become a parent and receive the unconditional love of a little person. Gain a certain feeling of pride from the fact that you're completely responsible for your child. There's no reason why you shouldn't enjoy your pregnancy and look forward to all the happiness and joy that parenthood brings.
The information in this feature is intended for educational purposes only. If you have any concerns about your health, the health of your child or the health of someone you know, please consult with a doctor or other healthcare professional.
Published: August 2008
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Last Modified: 19/08/2008
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