How to afford time off with your baby

Having a baby in the middle of a recession can be trying at times and parents all over the country are tightening their purse strings and finding new interesting ways to economise for the family. Read an extract of Becky Goddard-Hill's new book, 'How to afford time off with your baby' (Vermillion:£7.99) for ideas on how to ease the financial strain:

GET YOUR FAMILY AND FRIENDS ON BOARD

Tell your family and friends what you are planning to do about economising and having time off with your baby over the next few years. It is better to prepare them, and involve them if possible, so they may be more considerate regarding any gifts or support they may give to you. You also don’t want them to think you are stingy when you no longer buy them expensive gifts or take them out for dinner!

Announce your plans to take time off with your baby and state it with pride and as a matter of fact; don’t ask for or expect approval. Don’t be embarrassed about being financially constrained either, you are prioritising your child over your career and they will see far more of your baby as a result.

Every week I go to see my children’s GG (Great Grandma) and they see their Gran and Grandma at least once a week, too – neither of which would happen if I worked all week, because our weekends would be too precious to us as a small family unit and would be the only time we would have together. My extended family support me in many varied ways. They help me with childcare, playgroup costs, nappy buying, activity fees and organising birthday parties. They know the children incredibly well and consequently they get a great deal of pleasure from watching them grow up and taking part in their development. My mum introduced Frankie to the alphabet, GG helped him to grow tomatoes, Gran has taught him to make green dinosaur biscuits with lots of jam – important life lessons for a five-year-old, as well as a bank of lovely memories. Now his baby sister is here they are all delighted they will be around to watch her grow up, too. We do know how lucky we are to live so close, and I know that if I worked full-time, these visits would be far less frequent.

If you are lucky enough to have family and friends close by, involve them all you can in your baby’s life. As the ancient African proverb says, ‘It takes a village to raise a child’. If you share your plans, and the reason behind them, you are much more likely to receive greater empathy and more practical support. You may also get some unprompted financial help. My in-laws, for instance,make a small regular monthly contribution towards our living costs as they understand and support what we are trying to do, and this has been invaluable. Other family members and friends have also generously helped us out on numerous occasions.

BREAK OPEN THE PIGGY BANK

If you have any savings perhaps now is the time to ask yourself quite what are you saving for? There will never ever be anything more worthwhile spending your savings on than time with your children. Even if you don’t go back to work till they start school you still have years to work towards saving them a nest egg for university, buying them a car and helping them with their first house/wedding/child. But you only have until they are five before they start to build a world away from you. Enjoy them while you can.

I know people who have large savings and rarely see their children as they work so hard (often to save money for their future). Your children are here right now and most children would want mummy or daddy to play with them today rather than a trust fund at 21. (Don’t quote me however, as when they reach 21 they may well say they want the trust fund!) Children grow and build their own little lives in the blink of an eye; those five years go faster than any other in my experience. Of course, we have to look to their future but we have to be with them in the moment. Your baby is your best-ever rainy-day reason for spending your savings.

BE MONEY SAVVY

Before you bring your little bubba into the world, you need to take stock of your finances. Consider any debts you have before you make any decisions about how much time you can afford to take off work. Unfortunately it can be very easy to get into debt: you go a bit overdrawn or use a credit card and then you get charged interest; you go over on another account to pay it off and you get charged interest; you take out a new credit card to pay off all this interest and so on and so on. Before you know it you are facing real problems.

We are bombarded with TV adverts and mail shots promoting quick fixes to debt problems through yet another loan. Consolidation can be a useful exercise but not if it’s become a serial process where you’re never really repaying anything, just borrowing more and more and more. Do not buy into any quick fixes. Try very hard to avoid debt in the first place. Don’t spend what you haven’t got or know is coming in very soon. Pay off credit cards as soon as you can. Only go overdrawn if this is agreed. Talk immediately to your bank if you are in any trouble.

National Debtline (www.nationaldebtline.co.uk) works alongside the government. This charity provides free,independent advice around debt and can offer real support. Explore all such avenues before your problems get serious. Do not bury your head in the sand. You could lose family, friends and even your home. It goes without saying money borrowed needs repaying at some point.

Your local Citizens Advice Bureau could also be a useful lifeline either face-to-face, by phone or online. The key is to do something, otherwise your situation will only get
worse.

If you enjoyed this extract and want to read more from 'How to afford time off with your baby', visit www.rbooks.co.uk for more information or to buy the book.

To read Becky's blog click on this link - http://www.howtoaffordtimeoffwithyourbaby.com/blog.html

Last Modified: 09/09/2009

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