How to be a good role model for your child
You are your child’s first teacher but that doesn’t just mean abc and 123. You also need to set a good example when it comes to introducing your child to your family values and routines, and that means you need to model the good behavior you’d like to see your child display. Here’s how…
Nurture her…
Every day, show your child how much you love her with hugs and kisses and by telling her. Show concern for her fears and worries. In doing this you’re teaching her empathy: the ability to sympathize with another person and understand just how her actions impact on them. This can help when it comes to social skills such as
sharing and not throwing
tantrums if she doesn’t get her own way.
Stay calm
Young children have poor impulse control – it’s one reason why they can act up if they aren’t getting their own way or resort to physical aggression in an argument. It doesn’t help if your child sees you reaction aggressively to situations with your partner, other family members, or friends.
Your child needs to learn how to control her anger and the best way is to show her that you can control yours. If things are getting you down, count to 10 to avoid an explosion – make a point of doing so even if your child isn’t actually there, as then it will become a habit to think things through before you act.
When you have a problem, demonstrate to your child how you take a step-by-step approach to figuring out a positive solution. Then apply it to problems she has so for example: “Honey I know you and Zach both want to play with the toy so let’s work something out. How about you take turns?”
Do the same for problems you come up against, and reason out a solution verbally so your child can see your thought process. What you are aiming to do is create a situation where your child will pause to think about what you might do in any given situation and then use your example to help her make the right decision.
Communicate!
Listen to your child’s worries and fears so that she will know you are acknowledging them and that she can talk to you about anything. This will stand you in good stead as your child grows, since she will feel more able to talk it through with you if she is bothered by something instead of following the advice of friends who may not be best placed to give it.
Encourage learning
It’s vital that your child sees how much you value education. Let her see you
reading as often as you can, and read to her – studies show that children from families where parents read do better at school. Let her see how you use letter and number skills in everyday life: tell her how lucky you are that you can add up numbers so that you know how much to pay for your groceries, and how great it is that you recognize letters so that you can read stories to her.
Admit when you’re wrong
‘Fessing up is a skill all young children need! Use your mistakes as teachable moments as well as your child’s, to show her that everyone does something wrong now and then, that it is important that we take responsibility for our mistakes, and that it usually is easy to fix them.
Stick to your goals
If you want your child to follow through on things it’s important that she sees you tough it out too. Stick to your goals and don’t back down if challenges come up. You’ll be demonstrating self-discipline to your child and your can-do attitude can help her become a can-do kid.
Be interesting
If you want your child to experience the world as fully as possible, show her that you’re still curious and eager to explore it instead of staying in your comfort zone. It’s vital to show your child that she doesn’t have to be pigeon holed when it comes to the kind of person she is and her range of interests.
The information in this feature is intended for educational purposes only. If you have any concerns about your health, the health of your child or the health of someone you know, please consult with a doctor or other healthcare professional.
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Last Modified: 25/09/2009
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