How your partner can bond with your new baby
Many dads feel that women “instinctively” know how to look after babies, but this isn’t really the case. For a mum who never had close involvement with looking after younger siblings or relatives, her own baby may well be her first proper experience of one. She’s likely to be as clueless as you are about the practicalities of looking after your baby, so share the care and find out together.
- Get involved from day one – Do your share of nappy-changes, bathtimes and bedtimes right from the start so that you get to know your baby and feel confident looking after her on your own.
- Help with feeds – Unless your baby is being exclusively breast fed, you can do some of your baby’s feeds yourself. If they are exclusively breastfed, don’t forget that once your baby has established breastfeeding your partner can express some breast milk and you can feed it to your baby from a bottle if you wish.
- Take the time to read up – Chances are your partner has been devouring books about babies for months, so why not pick one up and have a look through it yourself? If you understand about labour and birth and about the aftercare of your partner and your baby you will feel more confidently in helping out.
- Take your baby with you – What better way to get to know your baby than to take her with you as you do some daily chores? Strap her in the sling and get out in the garden or take her shopping with you. Even if your baby is exclusively breastfed, a twenty-minute stroll together will give you valuable bonding time as well as a small break for mum.
- Don’t be a deaf dad – Be prepared to sometimes be the one who gets up at night to give that night-time feed, or soothe your baby back to sleep, burp her, change her nappy or give her a bath.
- Make special time together - Many dads see far less of their new babies than they would like due to work pressure, so make an effort to get involved when you are around, such as at weekends or during holiday periods. Have a special “dad and baby” time at weekends which can be your special time to do things together, such as going for walks or taking swimming lessons – see our section on Activities for Dads for some ideas, and give mum a well-deserved break.
- Learn how to soothe your baby - Don’t fall into the trap of simply handing your baby back to mum when she cries. Dads can be just as good at soothing babies as mums, and learning what is upsetting your baby and how to solve it is the first form of communication between babies and parents. See our features on Why do babies cry? and How to soothe a crying baby for ideas.
The information in this feature is intended for educational purposes only. If you have any concerns about your health, the health of your child or the health of someone you know, please consult with a doctor or other healthcare professional.
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Mothercare
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