Hi girls, need some advice, my partner and I live in a ground floor flat with a communal garden, there is a boy that lives next door who we can not stand, even though our 3 year old son likes to play with him, (lack of choice there as this child is the only other one there!!) This boy is 5 years old and is selfish, argumentative, nasty manipulative and a whinging bully! that may sound harsh but i cant leave them to play outside because it usually ends wiv my little one screaming because he's been punched or pushed off his bike or had his toys taken away and thrown because this other child wants them!! Im so sick of telling his mother what he's been up to but she really dont care, she wanted a girl and happily tells him she didnt want him, she doesn't play with him and quite frankly dont care what he's doing as long as he's not around her, but this leaves it up to me and im findin it hard not to lose my temper with this chid as im 38 weeks pregnant and just dont have the energy!! This boy expects to use our son's garden toy's without asking and gets quite nasty when i tell him its not polite to just take without asking, i try to keep my feelings for this boy under control and i know that with a loving family he'd be a great kid but he's not and he dont, at the end of my tether i dont know what to do, i DONT want my little one copying his behaviour but how can i keep them apart in the garden??? please help if you can, and sorry for the essay but this child really winds me up!!
Hon, being a mum of 4-ive crossed the same situation many times. There is always one child that is trouble and goes out of their way to make your childs life hell. Yes its sad that he's like this-but harsh as it sounds, its not your problem. Id be inclined to say let your child out when this other kids at school and when he's home either stay out in the garden with your little one and keep putting your foot down-or keep yours in. No its not right and its unfair on you and your little one..but being bullied at the age of 3 may have a profound effect on yours when he himself starts school. I hope for your sake you do manage to move soon as it makes for a stressfull and unhappy situation, but honestly..untill then im afraid there doesnt seem much else you can do. I hope things improve..good luck xxxx
hiya. my sister had the same problem with twins next door. she ended up moving house! not suggesting you do that. she got her boys to join lost of local clubs and invited lots of them over at once so the nasty nippers next door were outnumbered and soon ignored. having a few older kids about helped a bit too, so the tykes had kids to look up to.
I remember my sister frequently sending the neighbours kids home, saying if you cant behave go home and come back when you are ready to be nice. Its really horrible that the mother isnt interested and you shouldnt have to be the one to parent her ! good luck with it and the new baby on the way. let us know how you get on x
no need to be defensive just a suggestion. least your moving soon by sound of it.
unfortunately being nice to him just dont work, i've tried inviting him i for dinner, playing with them both and praise for good behaviour nothing seems to work, it really is a case of this child gets everything he wants just to keep him quiet and away from his mum, when we first moved in i felt really sorry for him and always tried to find the good in him but after 2 years i have to admit he's just spoiled and selfish,
oh no dont take that the wrong way! wasn;t lashing out at you! im sorry if i came across a bit brash im just so tired of this boy, and very hormonal at the mo wiv only 11 days till my due date. x
nah its ok sorry for being touchy its awful when you get to this stage of pregnancy seems to go SO slowly. i dont know what else to suggest that doesnt unintentionally punish your son too. console yourself with the fact that this brat and his mother are short of mates x x
no need to be defensive just a suggestion. least your moving soon by sound of it.
oh no dont take that the wrong way! wasn;t lashing out at you! im sorry if i came across a bit brash im just so tired of this boy, and very hormonal at the mo wiv only 11 days till my due date. x
hey, i have arranged play dates for him, and all sorts, but at the end of the day i cant stop him from playing outside, i've been tellin my lo that he is not to let this boy bully him and he is not to just give in to keep him playing with him, just this afternoon this child was demanding that my son get me to unlock his garden toys, (i have taken to lockin up his bikes and cars cos this boy has no respect for them and will quite happily take them and leave them in the car park, or throw stones at them pick them up and throw them, you name it he does it) so he could ride on his bike, my son told him no cos he wanted to play power rangers, so this boy took my sons toys and threw them accross the garden in front of me, then screamed that he wanted the bike and i was to give it to him, i cant believe his mother didnt hear him cos we were 2 foot away from her OPEN living room window, i told him no and that if he wanted something to play with he should go and get his own toys, well he told me to f*&K off!! was fuming so told his mother, and she did take him inside and screamed at him for ages, i cant say i felt sorry for him!! Hopefully we'll be moved soon as our flat really isn't big enough for 2 kids.
no need to be defensive just a suggestion. least your moving soon by sound of it.
Try a bit of reverse psycholgy. Sounds like this kid doesn't have much fun, what about when your outside taking some extra toys or a biscuit out for him and making a bit of a fuss of him if he does the slightest nice thing. He's probably only used to having grown ups pay him attention when he gets in their way. The stick to be firm when he's awful. Hard work I know. Good luck! x
hey, i have arranged play dates for him, and all sorts, but at the end of the day i cant stop him from playing outside, i've been tellin my lo that he is not to let this boy bully him and he is not to just give in to keep him playing with him, just this afternoon this child was demanding that my son get me to unlock his garden toys, (i have taken to lockin up his bikes and cars cos this boy has no respect for them and will quite happily take them and leave them in the car park, or throw stones at them pick them up and throw them, you name it he does it) so he could ride on his bike, my son told him no cos he wanted to play power rangers, so this boy took my sons toys and threw them accross the garden in front of me, then screamed that he wanted the bike and i was to give it to him, i cant believe his mother didnt hear him cos we were 2 foot away from her OPEN living room window, i told him no and that if he wanted something to play with he should go and get his own toys, well he told me to f*&K off!! was fuming so told his mother, and she did take him inside and screamed at him for ages, i cant say i felt sorry for him!! Hopefully we'll be moved soon as our flat really isn't big enough for 2 kids.
Aw i actually feel sorry for him if this is how is mum is with him no wonder he acts the way he does he may be jelous of your little boy to see him being loved by you and this is what he needs love i know it must be awful for you as he upsets your little 1 but perhaps try join in to play with them for half an our or so and show him how to play nice i know its not your job to show him but it would be nice if you could help him good luk hun xx
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