Why is everything "MINE"!!!

You are really describing the absolutely normal, completely classic behaviour to be expected from every two-year-old. If you have friends with children this age I’m sure they will be doing the same, though maybe to a greater or lesser degree. All children around this age think everything is “mine”. They really cannot help this –it is not till around 3 years that they can understand the needs of others. You need to explain this to your eight-year-old son that he should not take this personally, and all little kids behave like this to some extent. Of course this can be very annoying for older siblings, but your daughter cannot really help this behaviour. The concept of sharing is extremely hard for toddlers. That said, it is good to try and encourage her to do a little bit of this, but not to expect too much. Try to make a game of it –see if she will count out sweets to share, or set a timer for a very short time for someone else to have the toy before it goes back to her. Point out when anyone else is sharing- say something like “that was kind, your brother is giving you a turn with that toy”. Give lots of praise anytime she does even the tiniest bit of sharing, and don’t worry, she will gradually understand more about this, and not feel her life depends on hanging onto everything. One other thought, is to make sure she does have some possessions that are clearly hers, and a place to keep them, where no -one else interferes. Sometimes children feel if everything is up for grabs, there is no way they are letting go of anything, whereas if they have some really precious things they don’t have to share, they might be a little bit more likely to share others.

I shall give it a go, anything's worth a try! Thanks for helping! (Ps I'm a Vicki too - makes a change to see the same spelling!)

Thanks for the reply. It's nice to know I'm not alone!!! I have been taking her to a mother and toddler group but that has now finished for the summer, so I think I'll try and contact the Mum's from it to meet up during the holiday. My son never had a problem with sharing - just goes to show how different kids personalities can be!!!

Perhaps you need to leave her to have a tantrum? If you give in you are saying it is hers and over time she may get worse. The only thing i can suggest is to choose your moment carefully, so you can ignore the tantrum. So not just before mealtime or when MIL is on the way round! The other thing you could try is giving in (letting her have whatever she insists is hers, but then turning away and playing a 'sharing' game with your little boy with something completely different. That way she will see 'good' behaviour, will almost certainly want to join in. If she says 'mine' again. Give it to her and turn away again to play with your son. It may take a while, but as she picks up onm the idea you and your lttle boy can praise her like mad! xx

my little girl has just turned 2 aswel and also thinks that evrything is hers...my bath, my phone etc. i think its just a phase and they will grow out of it if corrected and taught to share. it might help taking her to a mums and toddler group where she has other children to share with. ive started to take my little one out with freinds children and am looking into sending her to a nursery a couple of hours a week so that she gets the interaction with other children. id also ignore the tantrums they need to know that they cant have evrything they want by throwing a tantrum, my daughter soon stops when she realises shes getting no attention for it! x

When my little girl plays with others everything is "mine" and she really has a problem with sharing. She has just turned two and seems to think everything belongs to her - and I mean everything....cups,TV programmes,food,toys,even hello's to other people!!!!! My son who is eight cannot win when he plays with her even if he asks for the toy etc. Anyone any ideas? We have tried everything that is obvious but all you get in return is a tantrum!!!