hiya

Just want to say thankyou for all of your replies, it has helped me alot. I actually got things sorted out with my partner thankfully and we both now understand what each other is feeling, thanks again lol xxxxx

oh im so sorry 2 hear ur feelin like this! the blues r horrible! i had post natal depression! & am still takin tablets 4 it! they help me no end! none of it is ur fault at all hon! have u spoke 2 ur doc about it? it may be worth makin an appointment as u need as much support as u can get! im sure ur eldest doesnt mean 2 upset u! prob jus tryin 2 get attention if u no wot i mean! men eh! lol! have a gud chat wiv ur partner to, maybe go out 4 a meal together, get the grandparents 2 babysit for acouple of hours! do u gud to get out & give u a chance to both talk! xx

hi,dnt blame urself or let any1 make u feel bad hun,u prob av got da baby blues,i was like dat at first all i did was jus sit there n cry didnt actually kno the real reason jus ad sooo much goin round in my head it wasnt nice at all,u need to tell ur partner u need his support,he dosent need to say anythin to u but jus listen to u or even jus cuddle u,thats wat saw me thru it all u need to feel ur not on ur own....dont let urself be sooo dwn u finally got ur baby in ur arms that u waited for for 9 long months enjoy it x x

Hi. First of all you are not on your own. I never bonded with my second child. He was born by normal delivery but had day 1 jaundice and an infection. This meant a lot of medical intervention. I didn't feel I could let myself bond incase the worse happened. I would say he was about 2 yrs before we really had a good bond. It was much stronger with his dad. I just went through the motions of what you do with a baby but put all my feelings into my first son (incidentally born by emergency c-section). He is now closer to me. My husband was very understanding unlike yours seems to be. We discussed my feelings a lot and when the bond came it was overwhelming but really good. I think after a traumatic birth you do need time. The bond will come as it did with me. Try not to shut yourself out to the possibility.

hi everyone It's been a week since i had my son SOL and today i think the blues have hit me big time. I am feeling really lost at the moment, i have a 2yr old aswell who i am finding hard to get along with he just seems to hit and pull my hair and try to bit me just out of the blue. My partner says its my fault? As i don't act as if KAI is mine, again? I didn't really bond with KAI at birth as i had an emergency c-section and didn't see him till later the next day and even then i had to wait a couple of days to hold him as i had a cold and he was in the special care unit, where as i feeel my partner took that away from me and he has more of a bond with KAI than i do. Its different with SOL even though i had a c-section with him i think its because i am breast-feeding i have had that chance to bond where as my partner hasn't had that time with him. I'm sorry i don't mean to go on just feeling very overwhelmed with everything and was wondering if anyone has had the seem feelings as myself, feeling very lost and sad.